Stabby stab.

Christapor Yaacoubian
2 min readNov 6, 2020
Time heals small wounds.

I live in an apartment or condo as they call it here or flat as we call it back home with 5 other people. The problem is that it’s a 2 bedroom “some will call it a 2.5 bedroom” the owner (Andrew) tells me. I would not. A solarium to me is the perfect room to put 2 chairs and a small table to play chess, read a book or have a coffee and take in the views.

NOT A FUCKING BEDROOM.

It barely has room for the chairs let alone for a bed or for a person to live there. Then there’s the den about the same if not shorter in length but wider in berth, still cannot house a person. It has no windows and the door opens into the area itself. One would need a Murphy bed just to enter and exit while living there. A hangover or diarrhoea will make this situation much much worse. Harry Potter was luckier.

I have no lounge room. Others call it their bedroom. I call them assholes.

I rarely use the toilet. I shower at the gym, which is convenient as I’ve found myself swimming almost everyday.

I’ve been to the gym for a grand total of once. But then I immediately stabbed myself separating frozen berries (for a post gym smoothie), typical.

Being stabbed hurts. But I found the inconvenience was the real issue for me. Having a knife inside your hand is just a pain in the ass. You have to clean and keep it dry. Bending…

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Christapor Yaacoubian
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When I moved to Canada I needed someone to talk to, so I began talking to myself. I’ve got a backlog of thoughts. How soon will we hit the present?